Sunday, 29 August 2021 11:01

Amazing Inner Growth - there IS a reason for everything

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I am so grateful for the ocean and for my ability to allow deep inner processing.  I am grateful for the client who so brilliantly triggered me to be able to access some deeply held issues of unworthiness to allow them to heal. 

I am an independent contractor who works for various people as a business assistant, property manager and various other business-related jobs.  I found myself very upset with one of the people I work with as my values just do not match his.  I don’t like the lack of compassion and respect for others and the worshipping of money above all else but the job filled a gap in my income.  It came to me so easily I knew I had to take it.  Also, my intuition was very clear about not quitting. Although I kept feeling as if I could finally quit by the end of October.

Over time as my frustrations (and disgust) grew I kept checking in with my intuition and kept hearing don’t quit yet.  I was finally able to disengage from my reactions and emotions to take a step back and try to figure out what was going on with me.  I found my lack of self-worth and childhood trauma made it very difficult for me to set boundaries, stop any codependent behavior, and not take responsibility for anyone else’s actions/decisions.  So I took the next step in healing that.

The emotions/issues felt like they were embedded into my foundation energy.  I was wiped out each day with the shifting energies – plus trying not to get swept up in the world issues. I was guided to go to the ocean.  I only live 4 miles from the ocean but hadn’t been there in a long time.  Over several days of walking on the beach, a LOT of old energy cleared.  It had been percolating for a few months, and intensely disengaging from where it was embedded for 5 days but it took 3 days at the ocean to release and begin the inner healing.  The first day of walking at the ocean I heard I would be leaving the job at the end of September. 

After all of that I let go.  I let go of my reactions to this person, my need for him to change, and my need to step in and apologize for his choices/actions.  As I have healed the areas from where this old energy came, I am also finding myself calmer about my financial future. I feel the potential of standing in my power and allowing and knowing.  I am more aware of my self-worth.

Today on the beach (it is now a week after I took my first walk on the beach) I realized it doesn’t matter if I quit or stay.  The reason for the job is done.  This phase of my growth has been very successful. I am grateful.

Read 11 times Last modified on Sunday, 29 August 2021 11:05
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Carlsbad, CA, USA

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